Not A Good Time

  

Ladies while the key to this blog is getting to sexy, I must discuss with you times when that sexy side of ourselves should be tucked away.

Lets Review:

• Family outings i.e barbeques, picnics, dinners at grandma house

This is not the place to flaunt your curves, fall back and just enjoy your time with family. If you have been working on your body and want to show it off then pick clothing that is figuring flattering, and slimming without putting yourself on display

• Hanging out with your man and his friends

If your man is cool with you dressing a certain way around his friends then cool, but I suggest keeping it cute and/or classy, and not show up with everything on display. It is more respectful that way.

• Work related functions

Be noticed for the work that you do and contribute not the tight black dress and juicy red lips you are showing off. If there is a co-worker you are trying to impress then a little flirting will get the message across.

• The kids sports games/functions

JUST DON’T! I have see it with my own two eyes, you should be there to cheer your child on not pick up a date for the weekend, again if there is someone there you want then strike up a conversation, smile, extend an offer to grab something to eat after the game. It is called flirting….

• Church

Again, I have seen it for myself so I am putting it out there.

• Your friend’s wedding/birthday party/baby shower

It is ok to allow others to shine, the spotlight is bright enough for all of us.

Sexxy in the Bedroom

    

Your bedroom is that sacred space that is all about you, at least it should be. The bedroom is an extension of your sexual, sensual side. Scented candles, low lighting, a night stand that holds all your *special* items. Your bedroom should be an extended view of yourself on a more intimate level. There should not be clothing, bills, (children’s)toys, and books/magazines laid out all over the room. It is not fair to you, and especially your man. You cannot invite your man to bed and there are kids toys laying on the floor, the dog is laying in the middle of the bed, and a picture of grandma is on the nightstand. Everything has a place and those items and others like them have no place in your bedroom, and yes I am saying sparky should have his own spot also.


Lets look at family memorabilia in the bedroom. If you have a large bedroom where you can designate a space, like a sitting area for family pictures that is great. If you do not then reconsider having family photos at the bedside. It just don’t seem right to have pictures of mom/dad, grandma, or the kids so close to the action. Something else to consider is your decorations and/or color scheme. Men may not feel masculine laying on floral sheets or anything yellow, pink, or periwinkle. Does that seem right to you? Your bedroom can still be pretty without having your man encased in flowers or any other girly pattern. If you must have that bright sunshine feeling in your bedroom then try balancing the lights with the darks. You want the bedroom to have a sensual feel to it and color plays a big part of it, try mixing masculine and feminine colors.

The final suggestion is use your bedroom for what it is intended for and that is privacy. The bedroom is that special place in the house where you and your man can be, do, or say anything you want in private(wink). Kids, work, school, bills, and distractions should be left at the threshold. This is an area for intimate thoughts and actions so make it that way. Keep items such as scented candles, massaging oils/lotions, and books of erotic romance tucked away in your room but close by for your benefit. Your lingerie should be in a drawer and easily accessible, not pushed in the back among other items you rarely put on. The idea is to keep sexy thoughts in the front of your mind when you enter your bedroom.

A Sexxy Date Night

 

     First of all, did you notice the double XX’s that means you can take this as far as you want once I give you the fundamentals of a sexy date night. I did not say romantic, I said sexy and yes there is a difference. This night will not be about looking into one another’s eyes over candlelight while eating dinner. I am not promoting romance, I am talking about a hot sexy night with your man.
Lets start the instructions with setting the scene before you even leave home, let your man know the only thing on your mind is a night with him. This can be done by kissing him and whispering these words in his ear, sending a text message(bonus points if you include a hot photo but noting to racy, you are just setting the expectation not giving away the plans) or leaving him a note(that’s old school but still works, and I promise you he will still have that note 10years from now).
     Step two, set the mood with your clothing for the night, less may be more if you are comfortable with that. What ever you wear it needs to be hot and show off your best assets.  Step out of your comfort zone and wear something you never would such as a corset, a form fitting dress. or one of his shirt with sexy lingerie underneath. Remember the idea is to let him know it is going to be a hot night. If he ask any questions about your clothing choices smile and say “I wanted to make sure I have your attention tonight”. Your makeup should demand a little attention tonight but don’t over do it. A man does not want to kiss a face full of foundation.
     The final step is the ambiance, I am telling you from experience some guys freak out when they see the romance thing happening because they do not know how to respond or what they should do. However every man knows how to respond to his woman when he sees she has gotten sexy just for him. Light Soy candles, they smell great and the wax can be used as a massaging oil when lit. Instead of wine have chilled Champagne and tell him you are celebrating the end of a long week and the beginning of a night with him. Keep dinner light, this night is not about slaving over a hot stove, I don’t  consider that romantic unless he is the one cooking.
    

What In The World, A Manicure Nightmare

  

I assisted a lady with the worst nails I have seen on a grown woman. They were chipped, uneven and dirty. Why would any woman walk around with her nails this way is beyond my comprehension. You can purchase a pack of emery boards for .99 and if you don’t have a nail brush, which is also .99, an old tooth brush with plain soap and water will work just find. There is nothing sexy about finger nails that are raggedy, dirty or with chipped nail polish. This also brings up the fact that it is unsanitary to have dirty nails because I am sure at some point in time your dirty nails will come in contact with food, GROSS.
Ladies there is no excuse for your nails to look unappealing. I am not a nail polish kind of girl when it comes to my fingernails, but they are natural, long, clean, and filed. This does not mean you should be walking around with a file and nail polish on stand by all the time. I am simply saying be aware of your presentation to others, even something as small as your nails is a representation of who you are.
If going to a nail salon is not your thing because of time, money, and/or sanitary reasons then invest in the items you need and have them on standby at home. Your hands are noticed by people everyday whether you know it or not so keep them nice, clean, and presentable. A good manicure is the most inexpensive thing you can do from home.
                            

The Fundametals of Getting to Sexxy

  

1. Clean house, go through your closet and get rid of clothing you don’t wear, can’t fit, or was a mistake to buy and donate them. Please reach out to organizations like Purple Heart(who picks up) and women and children shelters that can use these items. It is important to pay it forward and clothing, shoes, and handbags can always be used by someone else.    Do Not Throw Them Out, Pay It Forward.





2. Throw out old makeup, if you were not aware makeup does have an expiration date it’s just not printed on the packaging.

Foundation = 6 months

Mascara = 3 months
Lipstick/Lip Gloss = 12-24 months
Press Powder = 18 months

Eye Pencils/Lip Pencils = 3 years

If you purchase something you do not like get rid of it. The look will not change over time, and you will not grow to love it. Stores such as CVS, Walgreen, and Rite Aid will accept makeup returnes with a receipt for a refund if you were not satisfied.

     3. Getting To Sexy starts with layers and the first layer is the most intimate one, your undergarments. If you are holding onto undergarments that are to small, get rid of them. If you are holding on to undergarments that have holes. rips,  and/or tears get rid of them, please. If you have undergarments that you are a shame to be seen in by your man get rid of them. I do a through cleaning once of year of mind around February or March. I get rid of the old to make room for the new, and if there is nothing old to throw out I just add to it.  

These are just a few of my suggestions, let me know if you have some…..

 

 

My Fashion No No

  

I committed a fashion don’t, so learn from my mistakes. First let me start by saying I am very aware of what I look like before leaving out for work each day, but on this particular day I don’t know what happened.
I left out for work in a cute coral color dress to add some color in my life because I am a slave to the color black. I love it and wear it a lot for work, but today I decided to add some color. Now here is where I messed up. When you wear black it does not matter what color your undergarments are, nobody can see them. This particular day I decided to be a little wild and grab some leopard print panties with my black bra. Remember, I decided not to wear black and put on some color hence my fashion don’t.  I forgot to change my panties to a pair of solid black ones.
Half way through my day, I stop and stare at myself in the bathroom mirror at work. I could see spots, I gasped as I realized I was staring at my panties through my coral color dress. My leopard print was showing. Now thankfully the long light weight sweater I wear at the office to keep the chill away covered my backside so no one could see my animal print but the front view was a little different. I spent the rest of the day at my desk hiding my panties. When I did get up to assist customers I made sure to pull the front of my sweater closed to keep from giving a peep show.
Moral of the story, make sure you are wearing proper bra and panties before leaving your house, now if you accidentally leave out without any on that’s different, and I have a story for that too.

Bath Indulgence

  

One thing we should all be guilty of is indulging in a hot bath. Choosing what you add to your bath water to bring that relaxed sensual side out is your choice . I prefer adding my husband, but you may indulge in some sweet-smelling scent from Bath and Body Works or Victoria Secret and that’s cool too. It is nothing like the feeling of  hot steamy water surrounding you and slowly releasing all the tension your body has taken on. Again I prefer to have my husband but sometimes the smell of  Moonlight Path from Bath and Body Works will do the trick. Now, lets talk add-ons you can keep it simple with a little music (something slow and mellow). I am a 90’s girl so a little Jodeci for me goes a long way, throw in a little Anita Baker, Luther Vandross, and Maxwell I swear I am on 10. A nice chilled glass of wine is always a plus, and maybe set some candles to add mood lighting. All these a great ideas for getting to that sexy you, but for some who has time for all that? Lets keep it simple; you+hot bath water=relaxing moment. That’s it plain and simple, maybe throw in a little Epsom Salt to sooth tired, aching muscles.
The most important thing is the focus on yourself, letting the day fall away and just clearing your head. I promise once you step out the tub that relaxing feeling you have along with the dewy complexion from the steam will have you on 10. The next step is letting your inner feelings illuminate itself. Smooth on some great smelling body cream, Twilight Woods from Bath and Body smells awesome. Slip on a cute little short dress to walk around in or if your going to bed put on nothing at all and let him notice. Remember a hot bath can be your foundation to bringing out your sexy side so whether you make it over the top, or hot and simple relax and let out that relaxed sexy side that was tucked away.

An Unsexxy Day

We all have them, that day when you can give a flying fig about how cute you look, and feeling, or looking sexy is totally off the table. I get that and I have those days also. Today is one of those days.  Make-up is not an option and I am getting an attitude just looking at the flat irons. So, what do you do? When I was a young woman I felt I had to be at 10 every time I left my apartment. In those days I had a red lip just to go to the store. Now, I go slightly natural but still pull off a cute little look that is good for work or just going to the store. My trick is mascara and this highlighter by Neutrogena called sheer bronze glow. I totally fake it, I do the bare minimum with my hair, think straight flat ironing with no layers, or hair pulled back with a thin black headband, or even better a cute Fedora in a neutral shade(love this hat). Grab a neutral lip color and do your thing even if you don’t want to. Now to this add a large cup of coffee for all those that need a little caffeine(me, me, me) and you got this girlfriend. Strut your stuff,  no one has to know how you rolled out of bed looking, just let them take in how you look right now.

Morning….

Remember sexy is a thought, a feeling so even on your not so good day you can still have confidence in yourself and that will still have you rocking a sexy look even when you are not trying.